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SEARCHIN)Stupid Stuff
Here's the rubbish I cook up when I'm not feigning intelligence and resort to stretching unfunny jokes as far as I can. For reals.
[25/september/2008]
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me to warp to the newest stupidity like magic! (if a new one is posted a
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SEARCHIN)
[the awful truth]
It also doesn't help that all my large figures are kept in the roof's storage space.
[picture]
More frightening than Hostel! And I haven't even seen Hostel!
ARTISTIC LICENSE AND REALITY COLLIDE
[terrible realisation]
This is why I prefer drawing freaks rather than humans that end up looking like freaks.
[picture]
Ashura was saying how birds outside his house sounded like they were chanting "Timmy Timmy Timmy". So I said to be wary incase they start chanting "redrum redrum redrum" or "SWALLOW YOUR SOUL SWALLOW YOUR SOUL". Then he said what to do if they started singing music. I suggested sticking them on a car as a surround sound system. And so.
[picture]
It's almost like something you'd see in Faithmouse.
(apparently Faithmouse links back to whoever links to them. So I'm linked there. How embarrassing?)
[picture]
It sure makes looking at Paris Hilton a whole different matter. Or whoever the internet has decided to ogle over this week.
[picture]
Yes, he helps the overweight, but when will he set out to assist the working man?
[picture]
Our gracious host, looking very thoughtful.
[picture]
That boy rocker.
[picture]
I admit I took a lot of artistic license with this one.
Caricature: Blaze & Alvina (in the Victorian era!)
[picture]
Yeah, no idea why the Victorian era. I can explain why Blaze is smoking a duck, though.
"I think the previous commenters suck duck. Dick* I mean. ;("
Your lingual mishap is immortalised forever, Alvina! And mine could've been too if I didn't remember your name. I keep calling you Alaska. =(
[picture]
It is impossible to replicate his eyes with the standard paintbrush tool. Impossible. So I made up for that by putting him in an Egg-O-Matic, though at the expense of his chin. =(
[picture]
Meant to be a self-portrait of sorts but I somehow turned myself into a pseudo-furry emo troll thing. I got my hair just about accurate, though.
[picture]
Attempt two, where I look less like a dropout from furry league and more like a sad stereotypical Mexican Animal Crossing guy.
[picture]
I think this is the most accurate so far at the time of writing. Mainly because I shaved when I drew it.
[picture]
Now with facial hair and accurate legs! Chin is off-model, though.
[picture]
Why not?
[picture]
Steve, with a summary of himself in picture form that fits him like a picture glove.
[picture]
Some serious artistic license going on here.
[picture]
My ideal lifestyle. Although I'd look less like Groucho Marx on a bad day. And my tank would actually look like one.
[solution]
So many animes could have benefited from this. Sadly, I'm about twenty years too late to have saved the world.
[picture]
SMACK MY CHIMP UP
[grim reality]
Your dreams of hitting it big will never come true, people.
[animation]
I made this as some kinda jab at how crappy the animation is in anime. Watch the rocket turn into a brick, then a cube, then get scribbled.
[picture]
I love this picture! Seriously, look at it! It's a crocodile man in a speedo, with an unusually happy face, and a leg that's out of proportion with the other. My finest work.
CROCODILE MAN: SUPER FIGHTING AQUATIC
[this took twenty minutes to draw]
I think this is just taking unfair advantage of my occasional hits from Japanese search engine results.
[animation]
Looks like a relative of this fella.
[animation]
And dance he shall!
[MP3]
DJ Sam's debut song in his self-titled debut album, made with SUPER COMPRESSION and music samples found on some site I forget!
DJ Sam & Big Fatty - Fatty Fatty
[MP3]
DJ Sam's successful second single, with guest rapper Big Fatty supplying additional vocals.
[MP3]
DJ Sam gets down with his sad self. Music kind of stolen and edited from here. Actual gangster activity for once!
DJ Sam as Bizarro Santa Claus - Bizarro Santa Claus
[MP3]
Just like Slim Shady, DJ Sam's secret identity gets his own album. Took him long to say a swear.
DRAWING THE MONA LISA FROM MEMORY (on a laptop)
[bastardization]
I am a crime to humanity.
[picture]
And ready for prime time!
[comic]
Dragon Ball Z kinda sucks.
HEY LOOK OUT: really old, so I actually have a physical representation that isn't a yellow face. :x
"Draw Joe Musashi slicing Rodimus Prime's head off"
[picture]
Galvatron requested this, though Chromedome was my addition. I can't help but find Rodimus' feeble attempts to grab his head hilarious.
[picture]
Is clearly ready to go.
[summary]
Well, mostly. Cromartie High School is excluded from both the premise and suckage.
[rejected general writings]
Originally a General Writing, but it didn't fit in. My attempt at being as inoffensive as possible failed!
[picture]
The gruesome reality we all live in.
[picture]
NEVA FORGET [that one lawsuit where two fat teens sued mcdonalds]
[animation]
Fatty Comic Relief returns from the Lost comic for some booty shakin'.
[grim reality]
Independent thought is just waiting to be banned.
FIGHTING FOR JUSTICE: THE HEROIC AFRO MAN
[picture]
With a jet pack powered by HIS COOL
FIGHTING FOR JUSTICE: THE INSIDIOUS MOUSTACHIOED MOB
[picture]
A moustache that DUAL WIELDS PISTOLS
FIGHTING FOR JUSTICE: THE NEFARIOUS CAPTAIN COCKFIGHT
[picture]
It speaks FOR ITSELF.
[picture]
Nobody cares about the owner of a trash can. Especially ones whose trash contains perfectly edible cooked meals.
[animation]
A STERN FIST SHAKING INDEED
[revelation that the world is ruined]
That's why I stick to English. I struggle enough with it already!
[image]
I'm serious, every single GameSpot video review either has an enthusiastic bearded fat dude or some guy who looks and sounds bored out of his mind. I have no problem with enthusiastic bearded fat dudes, but it's rather worrying when almost all the reviewers are those type of people.
[comic?]
I'd like to see that happen.
GEORGE FOREMAN GRILL THROUGH TIME
[alternate reality]
Screw the big bang, THIS is what all those crazy banter people should argue about: The mystical powers of that grill.
GET THAT RUBBISH OFF THE TELEVISION
[comic, I guess]
Silly poster I did that accompanies that rant of mine.
[life-changing question]
WHAT DO U DO
[picture]
Really old, but it's still fitting.
[static music video]
For a Sonic Vegemite topic of potatoes versus vegemite.
#GO GO POTAT-O#
#YOU ARE DA MAN-O#
#YOU BETT-O THAN MAY-O#
#YOU ARE DA ROCK-O#
#YOU NOT A HO-BO#
#GO GO POTAT-O#
#GO GO GO#
[moral lesson]
Those gangs always be hassling me.
[comic]
True story.
[comic]
Birthday illustration for Galvatron. He suggested the druggy should've been singing "I Believe I Can Fly."
HAPPY BIRTHDSAY GALVER =)2.png
[comic]
"this is better than a new bike and galvatron II put together"
HAPPY BIRTHDAY (from "mistery admirer")
[gift]
aw shucks :]
also no mistery admirer i'm not 42 but i will be once i go back thirty years in my time machine lol
"Having
cars indoors is the awesomest shit ever"
[a statement just waiting to be contested]
A Hollywood mastermind in action.
[animation]
Oh nooooo~!
[comic]
Abraham Lincoln, Teddy Roosevelt and Steve Irwin mock Adolf Hitler's fetish. Who's surprised?
[comic]
That guy from 300 and Napoleon share an intimate meal.
[comic]
A penis joke. I'm ashamed. =(
How Cloverfield should've ended
[spoilers]
The director's cut has the victory rocking so hard that the events time travel forward to July 4th and the explosions look like fireworks. And it's recorded in Mothra-vision.
[picture]
HULK SMASH HULK CRASH HULK MASH
[picture]
I thought it was funny. =(
[picture]
A self portrait. =)
[comic]
Political satire? You tell me.
[picture]
Life lessons.
LET'S MAKE A VIDEO GAMING COMIC
[guess]
I attempt to make a joke on a kind of joke that's been turned into it's own joke and has ceased being a joke while mine lacks a punch line joke.
[picture]
If you treat flowers as life and kind of ignore the Holocaust, you could say that flowers are really the worst treated minorities.
(I think I'm going to hell again)
LIFE IS LIKE A WHOOPEE CUSHION
[picture]
Lampposts just aren't rooted into the ground like they used to be.
[new discovery]
It eats babies. =0
[picture]
Lost is hyped lots. I attempt to watch. I fail to enjoy, not just because of it being boring, but because how much hype surrounds the damn thing. I draw this. I attempt to watch Lost again. I fail. Again. =(
ps i lied lol
[picture]
uh
[picture]
um
[picture]
I think this was supposed to be a jab at male celebrities and what dicks they are, or the male population in general, I don't know.
[picture]
And here's the second version. It DOESN'T EVEN COMPARE to the previous one. =(
[a future in which I have no regard for mankind by having a son]
He's got my eyebrows and my dickheadedness. Goodness knows how he got both.
[picture]
I wish I knew what the hell I was thinking with this picture.
[battle of the opinions]
Well, versus the stupid part. If there's a smart part, that is (ZING)
[picture]
Opinions. IN IMAGE FORM.
[picture]
Based off a true story!
[comic]
Part of a long-running series of odd movies.
[picture]
I'm not sure if this is Sonic or some other generic Sonic-style hedgehog, but he has a gut and a mustache.
[picture]
I prefer the original, really.
MY IDEAL ANIMAL: CHAMELEON (take 2)
[picture]
Less of a chameleon and more of a martini drinking, boombox listening snake with sunglasses.
[picture]
Actually the result of being asked "what's your fetish?", but I won't hold that against Beattie.
[picture]
Despite everything in Beattie's gorilla, such as the Pokéball for a hand and two sets of ears, the mustached foot just steals the show.
[picture]
Pandas are pretty boring, so to improve it Beattie had to entirely change it. For shame?
[picture]
There aren't many ways to improve a penguin, so I need forty top notch philosophers to assist me on this.
[picture]
Beattie's list of awesome animal appearance additions.
[mini-biography]
The most realistic view into my riveting life ever.
[horrible realisation]
Ironically, I actually bought very few boxed toys, but it's hard to get buried under shoddy bootleg action figures.
[picture]
An award-winning in-depth documentary into the life of a sniper.
[hilarity]
Fun with console names without the use of urination or ding dongs!
[image]
BACK IN BLACK
[shocking reality]
And that's why slow news days were invented.
[comic]
But the real question is, do we care?
NOTE TO PEOPLE HIRING ME FOR ANIMATION PURPOSES
[public service announcement]
If you want me to imitate a style used by anyone else...
[comic]
I watched that episode of Transformers twice and still can't exactly wrap my head around it. So it exploded.
THE DAY THE ENERGY FACILITY WAS OVERTHROWN
[shocking truth]
Oh, the lost businesses of our country. I don't even know if textiles require computers, though.
[image]
deviantART is weird. I can't say it enough.
[picture]
Everyone's favourite article of clothing!
[potential game idea]
Your homies would be walruses.
[observation]
That's the internet for ya!
[thought-provoking picture]
Philosophicall.
[life-changing picture]
Philosohpical.
[fun fact providing picture]
Got it eventually. :]
[internet fetish in the making]
I think I just invented another internet fetish.
[comic]
That would make the series so much better.
[public service announcement]
There's that and the fact it gives four error messages before I can change a plug-in.
[fantasy]
You'd think seeing McDonalds characters as deranged convicts as boxers would make your life complete, but I'm let down.
RHH FORUM: ELECTRICAL BLUBABLOO
[picture]
Accurate summary of a real event.
[comic]
Based on a blog entry of a friend of mine.
[animation]
Look at him go!
[picture]
The stuff of nightmares.
[moral lesson]
It'd be even worse if someone else made the meal.
[picture]
Drawn just for the good folk over at The Rare Witch Project.
[picture]
Female celebrities in a nutshell.
[picture]
You know who I blame for this? deviantART.
[movie summary]
All you need to know about Snakes on a Plane.
[picture]
I honestly can't remember where I got the idea for this.
So Daleks are a bit crap at defeating the Doctor
[infomercial]
Seriously guys, learn to exterminate first and ask questions later. You're living jokes, now.
SOLUTION TO COMPUTER ADDICTION
[picture]
There was a news report about a bunch of Koreans who couldn't leave their computers, so some people made some highly advanced way of turning them away from their computers. Here's the simple way: Burn the damn thing and laugh at them.
[picture]
Look at him go!
[picture]
Beautiful.
[kickassery]
So somebody from the Metal Slug Database made this cover to a book I never read, and I felt it was lacking any resemblance of awesome. And then I read this summary and realised how the original cover is so much more fitting and mine should become a Hollywood blockbuster.
[comic]
Spamusement fan-comic, featuring an RPG guy (JONNM!) fighting a hideous layer of blubber that is OBSITY. Subject line by Sweet Tasting Jonas.
And just a heads up that I take my subject lines really literally, meaning facial expressions are mostly the only redeeming value.
Spamusement: BONANZA!!! YOUR EMAIL ADDRESS HAVE WON!!!
[comic]
A kinky e-mail address wins paper with zoomed-in text from a gorilla-armed game show host.
Spamusement: Catch the eyes of a passerby with a banner.
[comic]
My humour never changes.
Spamusement: Do you want resplendent lady?
[comic]
Screw actually looking for a suitable lady companion, just pick one up at the Lady Selection!
Spamusement: Do you want scenic gay?
[comic]
Pink tank top = homosexual.
Spamusement: Don?t let 1 more day pass without the proper coverage.
[comic]
Life lessons for any popular celebrity: Go outside.
Spamusement: FW: I think you are going to love this top-notchgift Dix
[comic]
Subject line found by some guy at their forums, cputrdoc. Zany robots don't make good gifts.
Spamusement: Meet the nawtiest babies that want it
[comic]
Another subject line by Sweet Tasting Jonas. It's a rattle.
Spamusement: Go Shopping with someone else's money!
[comic]
Love them expressions.
Spamusement: Here's how to score a Mac Mini Computer on us
[comic]
Computer fetishists. :x
[comic]
Those Australian cork hats never did look fashionable, did they?
Spamusement: IT HAS HAPPENED!!
[comic]
Modern day miracles never go as planned.
[comic]
Sweet Tasting Jonas's subject line is a recipe for disaster for this two in their game of charades. =0
Spamusement: PLEASE HELP US!!!
[comic]
Expressions and oddities.
Spamusement: Spark Romance with Valentine DVD Menus
[comic]
More expressions.
Spamusement: The last can openner you will ever buy
[comic]
I'm not a soup man, so I've no idea if it comes in cans. I'm so uninformed.
Spamusement: The rest of the world lives to eat, while I eat to live
[comic]
Obscure nerd joke.
Spamusement: Two fat teens trapped into boys shower. antenna
[comic]
Subject line by techstar25. Two fat teens and some kinda space bug, trapped in a small shower. WHAT HAPPENS NEXT.
Spamusement: You left something the other night
[comic]
Those things should be keychain sized for safety.
Spamusement: Your computer needs to be fixed!
[comic]
Only in some definitions.
[picture]
In a tank.
[image]
WOULD KILL YOUR FAMILY FOR A GALACTIC HEROES YODA & KASHYYYK TROOPER TWIN PACK
[animation]
Look at him shimmy and shake!
[public service announcement]
This is what happens when you don't rock hard enough to kill a man.
[comic]
I hate change!
[picture]
How could you not trust a face, oversized ear and claw hand like that?
THE CORE VERSUS EXPLODING CARS
[comic]
"Screw the Earth's core funking up, this is scary shit."
THE MAN WHO CAN SOLVE EVERYTHING
[picture]
I meant to try and make this into some kind of joke, but honestly, it works just as it is.
[picture]
LEAVE IT TO THEM
[picture]
Seriously, why do they bother with chosen ones? They still win, yes, but only after whining and bitching about it and being terrible as chosen ones. Why not just see if people are good at saving the world and use them?
[real comic]
The sad thing is that I like Rob Liefeld's stuff, even if my reason is simply for it being totally, completely absurd.
[comic]
Explaining why the place is rarely updated outside of Sundays and why I need some fashion tips!
[comic]
An accurate summary of the breath-taking sequel to that one movie.
THINKING AHEAD IS AN UNDERRATED CONCEPT
[moral lesson]
When someone lets you kill a man, do you make use of the offer? Food for thought.
[suggestion]
Seriously, they don't make horses for moody people.
[internet commentary on the internet]
Jumping onto any bandwagon is hip!
TRANSFORMERS IN NORTHERN IRELAND
[alternate reality]
What those paramilitary groups would gain by car bombing a giant truck and a sports car is beyond me, but it sure is fun to draw Mirage exploding orally!
Twenty minutes with Microsoft Publisher
[realisation]
You can create wordart, but not words? INCOMPREHENSIBLE
[picture]
I was talking to WDot, and he showed me some some online game, Nexiuz or something, and there was a screenshot of some downright ugly marine. Here's a recreation of said screenshot.
[observation]
More internet for ya!
[public service announcement]
This took me forty minutes to do. In that time I could've simply told you and complete Super Mario Land twice. At the same time, of course. Multi-tasking.
[true story]
Seriously, don't doubt me, I'M A REAL DEAL
[idealization]
Honestly, why has nobody thought of making spray-on heat?
(made on the 10th of December 2007, so if someone makes it I HAVE REASON TO SUE)
WHY I SHOULDN'T BE TAKEN ANYWHERE
[the sad truth]
In my defence, I was waiting for someone to exit the toilets and it's not like there's much conversation to be had in that situation.
[comic]
Food for thought.
